Review - God of War III

It has boobies!

I’d been meaning to play God of War III for some time and I finally picked it up the other day. I was immediately enveloped in it’s rich game play, picturesque graphics, and robust control scheme. All of these factors are what made this franchise one of the most lucrative and respected in modern gaming. While God of War III has been regarded as shallower, and a bit redundant in the series, I found the story compelling, and the game play to be exciting. Plus, one factor that really should keep the key demographic coming back to the controller THERE’S SOME MONSTER BOOBIES UP IN THIS MOFO!

WOW. Man you wouldn’t believe it! I’m playing and next thing I know I’m in Aphrodite’s room and she’s butt naked with two other chicks totally sexxin’ it up! She stands up and starts babbling a bunch of riff-raff while her monster jugs are just bouncing around the screen. It was easily the greatest moment in the history of gaming.

I about dropped the damn controller!

I just sat there and stared at those perfectly crafted double-d fun-bags as she pranced about the room talking to what’s his name, the main bald guy who is always all pissed off, is it Quan-Chi? Is that Mortal Kombat? Who cares. My point is: it was so awesome!

Not only was she naked and running around, there were two other broads who also had their dirty-pillows out, they were all hot and coy acting as they scrambled around the room and hid. It was so hot. But then, I couldn’t believe it; it got even hotter!

Demon-Mr-Clean guy started banging Aphrodite while the other two chicks with the monster mammories watched and got all turned on! Yeah, I couldn’t believe it either! I had to do controller motions to make him give it to her! The more she moaned the more the other two chicks got all touchy-touchy on each other! Finally I guess that baldy gave Aphrodite his finishing-move because she moaned in ecstasy as the two other broads fell behind a curtain lovin’ it up, and then story of the game continued.

Overall the game had great graphics, sound and a bunch of other good things that are great about games. Man seriously, the boobies, though, man. I mean—boobies—in a video game—nice ones.